I read about this business owner who was considering hiring an accountability “coach” (their air quotes, not mine).
Basically, they wanted a Zoom meeting for 30-60 minutes every week where this lucky person would check in on their progress and—ideally—help them stay on track.
But then they added, “Honestly, someone just nodding and smiling might work just as well.”
Huh.
At first glance, that sounds reasonable.
Because isn’t that what we think accountability is?
Someone checking in regularly…
Someone asking, “What did you do today?”
Someone giving you a little push…
And you know what?
For some people, that’s enough.
If your biggest challenge is a lack of structure—if you just need a gentle nudge—then accountability coaching can work like a charm.
In fact, if that’s really all you need, you could probably get the same benefit from an accountability partner or even a well-trained goldfish (goldfish are excellent listeners).
But… what if your issues are deeper?
What if the problem isn’t that you forgot to do the thing?
What if the problem is that you avoided the thing?
Or talked yourself out of the thing?
Or convinced yourself you’d do it later… and later… and later… until one day you wake up, and it’s 3 years later… and you’re Googling ‘can you die from too many unopened email notifications’?
See, I’ve noticed something.
For business owners who lean toward perfectionism, overthinking, self-doubt, or people-pleasing… accountability coaching can backfire hard.
Because when things go wrong, your brain is more likely to see accountability as a threat.
You can blame it largely on a little panic switch buried in your head called the amygdala.
This is your brain’s built-in security system… the part responsible for detecting danger.
Normally, it fires up when you’re, say, about to get hit by a bus.
But if you’re the kind of person who ties your self-worth to being perfect, competent, or liked…
Then your brain can treat failure the same way it treats an oncoming bus.
In other words, the fear of not meeting expectations can make your amygdala go DING DING DING!!
So when your accountability coach asks, “Hey, did you do the thing?”
Your brain doesn’t hear support.
It hears “Quick, do something! Anything but failure!”
And that’s when it goes into fight, flight, or fawn mode:
Fight
“Ugh, I don’t need someone micromanaging me.”
Flight
Leaves email on unread for 3 days and hides under a blanket.
Fawn
“Yep, totally making progress!” (a lie, but hey, at least you don’t look bad).
Suddenly, those check-in messages are not just check-ins anymore.
Now, they’re just reminders of everything you didn’t do.
And if your accountability coach isn’t trained to recognise what’s really going on—if they don’t understand the deeper psychology behind why people get stuck—then they just… don’t see it.
They don’t know how to help you.
They just keep checking in.
Asking what you did.
Reminding you of all the things you should be doing.
Until all that accountability just turns into one more thing you “suck” at.
And that’s why, for some people, more accountability = more resistance.
So before you hire an accountability coach, ask yourself this:
Is my problem really just an accountability issue… or is it deeper?
And if you don’t know the answer…that’s exactly what the Productivity Hotline is for.
Not just to tell you if it’s deeper, but to show you why, how to actually get unstuck, and how to start moving forward.
Details here: www.yosianderson.com/
Tp. Tp.
There’s more where that came from!
See, I’ve been writing daily productivity emails for online business owners since November 2024.
And what you just read is barely a scratch on the surface.
The real gems… The fun, insightful, and occasionally absurd behind-the-scenes stories… My best offers… The kind of stuff that makes you go:
“Wait… did that REALLY happen?”
I don’t blast those out to the whole internet.
(Some things… should be kept private.)
But if you want to snoop around… if you want to see what really happens in AYAPYLand…
There’s a door.
And it’s open.
For now.